U-Turns

On the back of “Testing and Developer Equality”, Colin highlighted some minor problems in the code base and made a statement of “Any Tester should be comfortable picking up these items and writing code to fix it”.

One of the Testers spoke up and said “Not all Testers are comfortable, I for one have no interest in coding. Please don’t ask me to code”.

Then Colin quickly u-turned and said “I never said all Testers can code, but the ones that are interested in learning can pick these up”.

That’s not what you said Colin.

U-Turn #2

A Tester asked for help diagnosing an issue he found, and asked who could debug the problem on the Test Environment. Colin replied, and made a statement about having to install some debugging tools and how it’s going to be difficult because it’s a server-side problem.

Many developers have made comments in the past on how it’s basically impossible for us to debug server-side issues with our infrastructure (we can obviously run the client and server locally on our own computers, but sometimes problems are with specific data on the Test Environments).

Recently, I tried it to see what the problem actually is, and it worked perfectly fine. No idea where this myth came from, but it’s been passed on for years. You don’t actually need to debug the actual server. You can run the server locally as long as it is the same version. You just need to point towards the Test Environment’s databases rather than your own.

So after Colin’s statement, I described my findings about debugging the server and data.

Colin then responded “I never said that you cannot debug the server”.

I knew he was talking nonsense. He was definitely implying you cannot debug the server. I also remember he said it a few weeks prior. I searched Slack for his post history and I found it.

“If server side, then we have to try to recreate the issue in our own environment.”
Colin

I don’t get why people can’t just seem to admit they were wrong and be grateful for your information. I normally write something like “oops, I was mistaken” and then choose a funny emoji like 😖or 😜

Testing and Developer Equality

I think it is possible to have an “us and them” kind of attitude between the developers and testers. You are supposed to work together to a common goal; deliver quality software.

Since testers have the responsibility of making the final call if the work is good or not, and can send it back to the Developer, then there can be some resentment here. I have felt that a bit when I was a Tester, but it’s rare to witness events like that.

There was a time when it was announced that the Software Tester job title was changing to sound more important, and recently, there has been rumours that my employer is considering making Developers and Testers: “Engineers”. I don’t understand what a blanket term like that even achieves. Surely it is a nightmare for managers to sort out projects in the future. New managers may end up trying to put several Testers in a team together because all they see on a spreadsheet are several “Engineers”.

Surely it makes recruitment harder when you are advertising for “Engineers” and it isn’t clear what job you are applying for.

Some Testers can write code, and they will create Automated Test scripts, or some helpful application. Not all Testers can write code, or have even a slight interest in writing code.

I think it’s a case of managers trying to fix a problem that doesn’t even exist. There have been a few Testers that were vocal that they don’t want to be called Engineers. They are Testers and are proud of it. They feel that being called Engineers will come with the expectation that they have to be able to code and they don’t want that. I’m sure some Testers will be happy with the proposed change, but I think most people will agree it is a stupid change.

I do wonder who came up with the idea? Why change something if there isn’t a problem? What problem is this trying to address?

“Working Closely”

My manager calls me.

Manager: “Do you know Andy?”

Me: “Yes, he is one of my best friends”

Manager: “Great, because you will be working closely with him.”

Me: “Brilliant news. So does he know about it? How do we go about splitting up the work; is it a big project?”

Manager: “Well, simple answer; you aren’t splitting it; you are doing it all.”

Me: “Oh.”

How is that working closely? After I got more information, it turns out all I was doing is merging some of Andy’s work into another code branch. Andy could have just done it. Complete hype for nothing.

I Agree

There’s one guy in my team that always wants to portray himself positively. So he loves talking, and, in my opinion, he basically keeps taking credit for other people’s ideas; or at least wants people to think he had some contribution to them.

So here are some clichéd phrases that he reels off in every meeting:

When someone says something good:

“I was just about to say that”
“I agree with that”
“I was just thinking that”

If he thinks someone knows more than him:

“We need to touch base”
“We need to arrange a catch-up so we are on the same page”

If he says something stupid:

“I’m only asking the question for everyone’s benefit”
“I just wanted to call it out so the decision is documented”

Becky did a similar thing the other day:

Becky: “a menu option disappears until you log out and back in again. Do you think that is a feature?”

Sean: “Sounds like a bug”

Becky: “Yeah, that’s what I was thinking”

Sean: “If we introduced it, this will need to be fixed before the release goes out”

Becky: “Yeah, that’s what I was thinking”

No, you were thinking it was a feature like an idiot.

It turns out she was just logging in with a different user profile. So the feature wasn’t there to begin with on the first profile.

It annoys me when people just pretend to agree. If you don’t understand something, then someone needs to explain it to you more. In the first example, he does ask questions to get the information, but he also claims he agrees in an unreasonable number of situations. If someone comes up with an awesome idea, let them have their moment of glory rather than using phrases like “I was just about to say that”; because that devalues their contribution.

The IP

Becky: “I can’t contact my machine.”

Shows a screenshot…

initially pinging her machine by IP address; it is responding.
She tries to remote on using the machine name, and not the full address; Didn’t work.
Then she tries by IP, but it’s a completely different IP to what she was pinging; Didn’t work.

I reply “You are using the wrong IP”

A couple of hours later, she replies: “Nevermind I went into the office to restart it”…even though we are supposed to stay at home and not go to the office.

VMception and other Tales

We were supposed to be using a program to connect to a Virtual Machine. Some of us encountered a bug that prevented us from installing this software on our company laptops.

One developer asks

“Would we be able to install it through a Virtual Machine?”

Yeah of course. Let’s connect onto a Virtual Machine, then install some software to connect to another Virtual Machine that we actually want to connect to. Brilliant plan.

A Virtual Machine in a Virtual Machine. We could make a film about it – like Inception.

What we actually did is log the bug with the provider’s support team, and they quickly fixed it.

Chapter 2

We were given instructions on how to install this special Virtual Machine. We already have Office365 accounts, but for some reason, we were given a separate email address to use just for these Virtual Machines.

Beavis managed to make excuses to take the previous week off. When he finally returned to work, he wrote “I’ve been sent instructions; am I supposed to be configuring this virtual machine?”

<sarcasm> No, you just got sent the instructions to ignore them.

“I think it only works when you remote onto your work PC”
Rob

No Rob, it’s literally why we are using virtual machines, so we don’t have to remote onto something physical.

Then Beavis is up to his usual tricks, delaying as long as possible just to get out of doing work. He posts on slack:

“The instructions say to log in using my new email address. Do I have to log out of my usual work email because I’m already signed in?”.
Beavis

Is that a serious question? How many websites allow you to log into them with two different accounts at once? Just log out, or use a different browser. Simple.

The other thing of note in the instructions was the 2-factor-authentication. “If you use another app like Authy then you need to download Microsoft Authenticator as well.” I guess the instructions could have just said “You must use Microsoft Authenticator”. That would have been clearer.

Another team member says “I’m getting an error”

“What app are you using?”

“Google Authenticator”

<facepalm> (－‸ლ)

Public Speaking Expert

A former colleague left to set up some kind of business to do with public speaking. He did have a fairly short-lived video channel where he posted up vlogs about software.

He was a terrible speaker.

There was one video where I thought his dialogue was so funny, I typed up the transcript, so I can laugh about it in the future. Well, I have found the notes. Here it is:

The reason for that is that a good friend of mine, erm, erm Neil, who I went to university with, erm, commented on Facebook, er and said, you know ‘what do you mean by “Digital Service”, surely it is just software?’.

Erm, oh erm and, I…yes it is just software, erm… but I…I’m trying to make a distinction, erm, erm, trying to make a point about, erm, er the nature of software and the nature of delivering software and that to me, erm software IS a digital service.

Erm, erm… you know… erm, there’s there’s, you’ll not have come across a software project that erm… simply, erm… you deliver the software and you walk away, erm that never usually happens, you you, you are actually delivering a service, because erm when you deliver software erm you sort of committed to support that software, you committed to provide a service, erm, for me, software engineering is actually all about, erm, taking a service and transforming that service, such that you are providing new features, new functionality, maybe you are joining things up.

Maybe you’re, erm, erm, you are seeking to refresh that service, you are seeking to, erm… ensure that service is continuing to deliver the value it’s meant to deliver. You are maybe looking to make sure the service is more efficient. You, you’re using, you’re developing some software, delivering some software to transform a service.
“Software” vs “Digital Service”

I hope you understood that, because I certainly didn’t.

People often add filler sounds like “erm” when they are nervous, but he had all the time in the world to write a script, record it, and edit it. It’s not a great promotion of his “skills” that he is selling.

The YouTube Channel

A colleague promoted his YouTube channel which is the result of an amazing idea he had during the Coronavirus lockdown.

He thought it was clear that “people who didn’t have access to the internet, or lacked the basic digital skills would find this situation an immense struggle”.

So his solution is to create a YouTube channel where he makes videos on basic stuff like “how to use a mouse”, “how to use a touchscreen”, “how to navigate a website”.

There’s a major flaw in his idea.

How do people watch YouTube? Does someone print it out for them? No? So they have to go on the internet and use basic skills to navigate to YouTube, in order to watch a video telling them how to do so.

Even though he promoted it at work and many colleagues would have watched the content just to see what it is like – he only has 350 views and 12 subscribers in nearly 3 months. Don’t quit your day job.

Buzzwords #2

I’ve got another great quote which features a combination of buzzwords within the same sentence, stated by the same manager as documented here: Buzzwords

The proof-of-concept endpoint is the culmination of efforts across the application space. It will migrate into an integration account used by teams going forward for the integrated product.

I can’t stand it when people churn out nonsense like that. What does it even mean? Does it just mean “a team has written a framework”?

Conversation With My Line Manager – A Project Review

My manager asked me how the project is going. I was honest with him. I stated most of my concerns.

First of all, the teams aren’t well defined. We have some User Stories that seem like they would sit better with the team handling Authentication. We also have work that shouldn’t be much work on our side, as long as the UI Controls team have created the controls we need… but they haven’t – so that work has to be marked as “blocked”. Then you also have what I call “Team Duplicate” who are just duplicating our work.

I ask my manager what Team Duplicate is for, and why they just don’t merge with my team. He doesn’t give a straight answer, he just says:

“trust me, there is a difference”.
Line Manager

He is leading that team, and he can’t even explain their purpose.

I also said we don’t have many User Stories that are true User Stories. They have that name because they are from a User’s point of view. They should be defined like “As an admin user, I want to manage member’s privileges so they can access confidential records”. They shouldn’t be “As a menu, I want to provide options for the user to click”. Seriously, we do have some written like that.

My manager said my opinion was interesting, because someone else had said the same issues to him.

“Oh, so are you going to do something about it?”
Me

“No, it’s not my responsibility”
Line Manager

Brilliant. Multiple of his line reports are complaining about big problems but he won’t feed it back. Why can’t managers manage all of a sudden? They were fine last year. Now they have all given up and forgot their skills.

I could raise the issues myself I suppose, but it didn’t used to be this way. Also, part of my problem is the team he is managing, but he doesn’t agree there is a problem there.